THIS AIN’T JUST A HOODIE—IT’S THE ONE-STAR HUMAN REPELLENT FOR EVERYONE DONE FUNDING THE DISAPPOINTMENT FACTORY! Blasted with the full “Every one of you is a walking disappointment factory” declaration across legendary Comfort Colors thick-ass cotton cozier than the lie that “people are mostly okay,” this hooded sanctuary hits in 13 savage colors and every damn one is as bitter as kick-ass black! Sizes S-3XL for every misanthrope who wants to hibernate until the species evolves, custom-printed on demand because interaction is canceled! If this hoodie doesn’t make crowds part like the plague just walked in, we’ll cocoon hell itself—no questions asked! Hood the horror. Worship the hate. Wear the One Star like the final boss who stays warm wrapped in pure, cringe-proof contempt!





Product features
- 100% ring-spun US cotton — light and smooth for comfortable everyday wear
- Jersey-lined hood with natural flatcord for a soft, finished look
- Relaxed fit with rolled-forward shoulders for easy movement
- Lightweight fabric (6.4 oz/yd²) — breathable and layer-friendly
- Made with OEKO-TEX low-impact dyes; member of the U.S. Cotton Trust Protocol

Care instructions
- Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F)
- Do not bleach
- Tumble dry: low heat
- Iron, steam or dry: low heat
- Do not dryclean